God, Aliens, Death & Teapots (published)

It's very, very pleasing that my 100th post on this blog should celebrate another of my literary creations being published.
Here it is:

A mix of seven short stories (some really short, some quite a bit longer, all of them awesome!).
And what's more, I'm benevolently making this available to my adoring fans for absolutely nothing - zilch - nada - zero.
Yes, that's right, it's FREE!
But what's this? I hear some cries of bewilderment from the capitalist cheap-seats - has Andy lost his mind?
Fear not, dear friends, there is a cunningness about this plan, for secreted at the end of those seven stories (which are all f**king excellent by the way) is an excerpt from 'The Book That THEY…'
Sighs of relief and appreciative nods may commence.
Of course I haven't lost my marbles. 'Tis but a clever marketing ploy to try to bolster the sales of 'The Book That THEY…' so that it creeps over the 100 sold mark (a psychological barrier indeed).
So, to all those fantastic people out there in Readerland who have been so kind as to take interest in this blog - download your copy now - from here: Download free for your Kindle from Autharium
It should be available on Amazon soon and it's already up on Goodreads, expectantly awaiting a rush of glowing reviews.
ENJOY!!

God, Aliens, Death & Teapots

That's right, folks.
Today I finally got round to finishing the proof-reading and last-minute re-writes of the seven stories that have gone into the little anthology of short stories that is God, Aliens, Death & Teapots.

God, Aliens, Death & Teapots - out for comment.

Okay, so I am hoping to use this as a crude marketing tool for the much beefier 'The Book That THEY…' by surreptitiously sticking a short extract from my uber-fantastic (even if I do say so myself) debut novel, but who cares?
It also gets what I think are a set of really quite good little tales out there in the wider world, and that can't be a bad thing, can it?
Of course not.
I think I'll give it a week or so and then look to see if I can get the book published for real.

If anyone wants to download and let me know what they think (the link is above), all comments would be gratefully received!

Bring Back The Stocks

I've decided to post about something other than writing today, and I've decided to be controversial.

None of us will remember Stocks. But we've all heard of them.
Stocks were (according to wikipedia) 'devices used internationally, in medieval, Renaissance and colonial American times as a form of physical punishment involving public humiliation. The stocks partially immobilised its victims and they were often exposed in a public place such as the site of a market to the scorn of those who passed by.'

Now (after the events of the last 24 hours, which has seen my niece being assaulted by a group of drunken louts and my nephew's mobile phone stolen) I'd love to see these back in action in towns and villages all across this great nation of ours. I think a day or two in the stocks would be an excellent alternative to the pointless bullshit that is community service or a suspended sentence.
Let's get back to punishing wrong-doers, rather than getting all wrapped up in deep philosophical discussions about the need to rehabilitate. Something quick and cost-effective...like the stocks.
We'll not bother with a roof if its wet or sun-cream if its sunny (which would no doubt be high on the list of the hand-wringing liberals!). Not even a cushion to sit on. Just a sign behind them saying 'This is a criminal. Their name is xxx. The crime they committed is yyy.' - and maybe a bottle of water (we wouldn't want them to become dehydrated, would we).
If they need a shit or a piss, well, that's just tough.
Should passers-by be allowed to throw rotten fruit at them? Should young boys be allowed to urinate on their heads?
Points for debate, methinks...hold on, what's that?
Did someone say that what I'm proposing here is barbaric?
O contraire, mon ami.
What's barbaric is a society which has over thirty 'charities' set up to fight for the rights of criminals, but only one which fights for the rights of victims.
What's barbaric is how an individual who has stolen the property of an ordinary hard-working, tax-paying citizen is usually only 'cautioned' by the police (if the police can actually be bothered to follow-up the crime in the first place). That's not really a deterrent,is it?
What's barbaric is how it costs society £40,000 a year to keep a criminal in prison, money that could be used to pay for cancer treatments.
What's barbaric is that someone who has broken the law and been locked up because of it is being given the opportunity to vote on how governs the very society they have transgressed against.
What's barbaric is that prisoners get proper meals, colour TVs and Sky in their cells, when hard-working folks often can't afford these.

I think it's time for society to ask itself a question. If one of the few things we ask an individual to do is abide by the law, why should we not punish, quickly and harshly, those who choose not to?